I generally hate early January, except when there is masses of snow up in Guzet and the woodburner is burning fast and furious chez nous. I dream in vain because this year we decided, for various reasons, to have Christmas in England. It was lovely, of course, but my sense of deprivation, due in large part to the dreary, dismal, grey weather, makes me feel even more fed up. The heavy snow, which covered the whole of the UK and decimated the transport network, first stranded me in Dublin for three days with my daughter [always a joy!] and then forced me to give up all hope of getting down to Bardies in December to deliver Christmas puddings, cakes and presents. Tant pis.
For some bizarre reason I've just discovered, I forgot to blog in November, which is just as well because it would probably have been a rant about the fees charged by French banks, the hike in our 'taxe fonciere' and 'taxe d'habitation', the price of 'fioul' to replenish stocks for the central heating for winter and, inevitably, the failure of my battered old Jeep to pass its 'certificat de controle technique'. In the event, the first two I could do nothing about, the third proved not to be too bad due to my continued absence and the last, amazingly, a minor miracle because I've been given a year to put the faults right. Thank goodness, because by now my car would have been permanently grounded at Blagnac.
Enough of my ranting! There is something about January that pressages the spring to come. It remains, for me, a time of reflection, on the year past, future goals and lessons learned. I like to snuggle up, self-indulgently in the warm, and ponder my navel. It's less of an effort after Christmas because one's stomach sticks out more! When the weather is bleak, it's easier to stay indoors to think and write. The first hurdle for any aspiring writer, I always think, is to get one's bum on one's seat for at least two hours at a stretch. With fewer distractions, the creative juices begin to flow [helped greatly this year by Radio 3's incredible twelve days of 'The Genius of Mozart' - how I shall miss it tomorrow].
Even walking the dog at this time of year is less of a chore because a bit of exercise becomes a luxury rather than a necessity. 'I think, therefore I am' - was it Sartre who said that? So, in this navel gazing mode, I found myself thinking about Bardies on our tenth anniversary here. We bought it on the spot exactly ten years ago, for it was love at first sight for both of us. We were mad, I know, but neither of us has ever had a moment's regret. Our children were six and eight at the time and these last ten years, seeing our children grow there with their friends and cousins, have been the greatest joy. Home is where the heart is and my heart will always be here.
Bardies has taken a lot of love, work and dedication, not to mention money. She is a demanding mistress, always asking for more just when she's taken your last centime. If it's not rain pouring through the chateau roof, it's the potential collapse of the barn roof. Whenever one lot of broken guttering gets fixed, another section breaks apart in sympathy. We run, with buckets, to stand still! We still haven't tackled replacing the draughty windows and doors, although, to be honest, I can't bear the thought of losing the beautifully leaded glass panes in the rickety old 18th and 19th century windows. The prospect of every house looking the same to conform to well meaning regulations fills me with horror. If the answer is to stay away in deepest winter to conserve precious power, then so be it.
We have done so much over the last ten years and we plan to do so much more in the next ten too. With a fair wind, we should be able to finally restore the old barn. The preliminary work has been done by the indomitable Sean who, as ever, has done a stirling job. He is not called 'Mr Perfectionist' for nothing! It is so exciting to have a project, and this is one of many. Actually, it is the linchpin upon which most of the others depend, so watch this space! My sister-in-law in Germany once said to me how lucky I was because we had a dream - something to glue us all together and give our lives purpose. The blues festival, likewise, has become a family affair, something to cherish and be proud of when the guitars are finally hung up. The next one will definitely be in 2011, to celebrate a special anniversary in our household.
So, after ten years, it seems like we are still only just beginning. We have been so privileged to be a part of such a magical place - ten years in a history that spans centuries. Indeed, if one reflects on the pre-historic caves close by, we are a teeny part of a history that spans many millenia. How amazing is that? We are also thrilled that descendants of Louis Henry, who spent summers here when they were children, will spend some time chez nous this summer. The continuum of life is a precious thing and such a special direct connection will be one of the great joys of this year. So, here's to 2011, and the next ten years. I feel sure that the best is yet to come.
